...not so childhood dreams...

I watched the movie Bride Wars tonight (because my plans fell through. again.)
I remember when I first saw the movie in the theater...I went with Alex and we absolutely love, love, loved the movie. We loved it so much! Right after the movie, we went and bought bridal magazines so we could be just like Kate Hudson and Anne Hathaway's characters.

They put together something somewhat like a scrapbook of how they wanted their weddings: flowers, colors schemes, cake, all the way down to the dress. We were going to do the same thing...

Watching this movie tonight reminded me that, unfortunately, we never actually got that far. I don't even think we made it all the way through the bunch of magazines we bought. They're still sitting in her room somewhere. It also reminded me of how close we used to be and it hurts to think that we will probably never be that way again.

But, I know I'll be okay with that. I've been trying with everything I am to try and be 'close' again, but I've decided that I really don't have the energy anymore.

We've both been through a lot since our friendship ended and neither of us quite knows the extent of it. I want it to be like it used to be, but I'm done living in the past...I've even removed most of the stuff from my room and walls that reminded me of high school because I realize that I've grown up and I have better stuff to worry about and think about.

...ok...back to the movie...

At the very end of the film, there's a quote that I once sent to Alex when our problems first began and I'd like to share that with you all tonight.



"Sometimes in life, there really are bonds that are formed that can never be broken. Sometimes you really can find that one person who will stand by you no matter what. Maybe you'll find it in a spouse and celebrate it with your dream wedding...but there is also the chance that the one person you can count on for a lifetime, the one person who knows you, sometimes better than you know yourself, is the same person who's been standing beside you all along."



Of course I still have dreams about how I want my wedding to be, but I guess I'll have to plan them on my own now or with my future 'hubby-to-be'.

In my heart, I know that those memories we shared were some of the best times of my life. But I also know that they are in the past and I'm learning to deal with that...as hard as it may be, I'm learning.